I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
