She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
