oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
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