Im at strip club and am horny
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize