we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
