Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
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