sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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