woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Randomize