I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize