whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
