is this the sara with the beer cane?
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
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