I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
