The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
