i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize
