I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
Randomize
