a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
