Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
