i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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