Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
She's not a foreskin expert like you
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
