If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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