i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
