Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Randomize
