It's like God shit irony all over that family
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Randomize
