is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize
