So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Randomize
