I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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