okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
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