They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
