I accidentally had phone sex last night
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
operation have a gay friend backfired
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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