So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
