I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
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