you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
found the other keg... it's in the tree
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
He? As in you personified your dick?
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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