The maid of honor just puked.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
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