I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
