this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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