they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
