Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
