I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Randomize
