Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
I need a beard to bite.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize
