is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
