either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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