you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
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