We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
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