Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
