if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
My cat gives me a boner
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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