its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
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