Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
