Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
she told me i tasted like america
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
