Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
