we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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